Hey Seigenthaler? Can I go for Free?

Sorry Folks... I heard the sub-title I spent an bitching about got cut off in the middle. Maybe I'll apply for a scholarship to one of those technical schools. Can't hurt-- my graduate degrees aren't worth Jack anyway!! Here's the link... I hope you can see the article and the HIPPA violation Loud and Clear!

From

Read Between The Lines

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I AM SOOOOO EMBARRASED!

Sorry for the disconnect... phone battery went dead. There is some good news (finally) Judge -- will be in the bench tomorrow...

Thank f'ing G-d! Because he is only person I can think of might actually take a look at the FACTS rather than the rumors. How many times do I have to call TennCare, Social Security, or the Mental Health Coop to tell to fix their own mistakes?


Ironically (and yes, I do think it is okay to cry, but also think it okay to laugh at your own problems too ("Lean to laugh at your problems, everyone else will.” When I told my rep payee to take good records, I let him know that even IF he things I'm pout my mind with paranoia, It would be so much easier to just do that than it would be to deal with me.

Legal Aid won't represent me because they said they limited resources-- well guess what? SO DO I!!!!

I went back the pharmacy and THEY DELETED scripts from my record.

Legal Aid & Pro-bono said they cannot recommend anyone to take my case for free since my father and sister are both attorneys they told me that they would have to either (1) come to Nashville (from Austria and Philadelphia to represent me or (2) make them pay for attorney fees.

Correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t that a little fuKt up? I spoke to someone at the PHD program because they read 64044: Medical Alert.

My sister is furious with me blames me for ruining my mothers wedding in Las Vegas, oh yeah... but she IS a "LAWYER." Whatever...

I drove 30+ miles again today to get my medical records, only to learn once again, they cannot find them.

I am so glad that there are at least a few people out there who remember me from when I was a kid people, and a few people who can identify without three blood tests to be transferred to a medical facility.

Yes, I ASKED to be committed. I called for help. I said it every single way I knew how, without asking people who were most able to give it.

I never forget a slight, and I am extremely grateful to people who didn't ask questions or doubt my intentions. I will hold themin my my thoughts, and can safely peomise that I will never agai call upon you for help.

There is something to be said for paying it forward. So to people who actually took the time to phsyically see if I was okay, and to two very specuial ladies who brought me vclothing after everything I had in my possession ws taken away from me... and to the photographer who actually observed my injuries, thank you. I canhonestly say that I took one for the team. For the tweeters and twackers who let me know I was alone in my journey.. you're right I wasn't. You can tweet for peeps without bering certifiably nuts. That's not to say I am not certifiably nuts, but I thinks it rather pretentious for y'all to think that you know my mind better than I do after after 36 years. I want to believe that this feel connected to a world filled with hatred, bigotry and violence.... I made it through. And I already paid it forward.

It is pretty clear what I need, and I so tired of people asking why I can't find one. Have you seen the news? What I need is hot water. What I need is a safe place to go. What I need is the idiot who fucked up my computer to fix the damn thing. I wouldn't having a safe place for Spotty, and a little bit of acceptance. So out of respect for people that I once held in high regard, I chose to take the proper channels. I fed them information without claiming ownership... I sold a news story for $1.00. Kool... I made a dollar last year. That will pay the bills.

There were people I respected and admired, and now see as shallow and insincere. People who are afraid to be associated with someone "like" me? What exactly does that mean anyway? Aren't you impressed that I'm a Harvard Lagacy? Am I not one of the "Chosen People?"

Do you think I am living on a tiotal income of $615.00/month because it is fun?

If you can do better, pleeeeeze let me know...

If I can see somebody else doing it, then maybe I could figure out how to do it myself. I am willing to learn from anyone. Just think of all the valuabnle lessons Hitler taught us??? Yes, people are sheep.

I learned even your mistakes, so is there nothing of value that I can bring to this community???

Would you like to try going on welfare for three months or so? I think yo would enjoy the application process. After all there is nothing quite like it in the world.

So, I was "ordered" not to vvolunteer, not to call the police if I hear gun shots, because only crazy people call 911 several times in one day. Only thing is, "crazy" people exagerate the situation, so clearly if I have lived for three years, then I can certainly wait another few months. Really?

I am only allowed to use than 100 words or less in my written correspondence. Thank God for Twitter, it is good training.

BTW (by the way ;-) The Gettysburg Address was only 267 words. Less than two tweets. Granted, I am no Lincoln, but every once in a while, I do say something important.

There is something to be said for brevity, but their is also something to be said about honesty, isolation, and the value of technology for people with disabilities. So let this be my project for "Save The Internet" because Legal Aid thought it was kinda funny when I told them that my Internet was scheduled to be diconnected.

Who needs the internet anyway? Who needs information, access, a forum, a voice??? And even if some tweets make me laugh, is that so bad?? Maybe even a small diversion from reality? Am I not worthy?

I foolishly believed that by volunteering in the community, I would come accross a real job with real wages and real benefits. Yeah, that was a great idea.

Don't worry.. I learned my lesson. I will volunteer no more. After all, why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?

Let it be known I'm a pretty quick study. I am cursed with a exceptionally vivid memory. My cortisol levels have been running low since '95. You figure it out. (Robert Sapolsky: Why Zebra's Don't Get Ulcers)

I am truly offended by the events that led people to call my family half way around the world and the country, when all they really needed to fdo was ask me. Not all "kids" are lost... some don't want to be found.

I was told to "go home." Well guess what, people? I am home.

Who thought it was a good idea to call my mommy and daddy to tell them how I am "embarrassing myself?"

Really??? Do You think they care? KUDOS TO YOU!

www.youtube.com/v/xumsvSi8qz0&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x3a3a3a&color2=0x999999&border=1">

Yes, I am reckless, I am loud, I am always right, and I am "out of my mind fucking nuts" also known as "OTWFN: Off The Wall Fucking Nuts" and that is the presumption. Don't forget, I am very much father's daughter, and am very much my mother's alibi. So thanks. Points!

All the better for them because the crazier I am, the less embarrassed they feel. How about some extra credit for their excellent parenting skills.

Crazy? Loud? Different?

Guilty, as charged. I am sooo embarrassed... how dare I post crazy shit like this online? Don't I know how bazzaar that seems? Don't you? Because let's face it... there are two possibilities:

(1) I'm telling the truth, and it's serious,

~or~

(2) I'm NOT telling the truth, and it's serious.

Krazy is, Krazy Does

Sorry for the disconnect... phone battery went dead. There is some good news (finally) Judge -- will be on the bench tomorrow...

Thank f'ing G-d! Because he is only person I can think of might actually take a look at the FACTS rather than the rumors. How many times do I have to call TennCare, Social Security, or the Mental Health Coop to tell to fix their own mistakes?

Ironically (and yes, I do think it is okay to cry, but also think it okay to laugh at your own problems too ("Lean to laugh at your problems, everyone else will.” When I told my rep payee to take good records, I let him know that even IF he things I'm pout my mind with paranoia, It would be so much easier to just do that than it would be to deal with me.

Legal Aid won't represent me because they said they limited resources-- well guess what? SO DO I!!!!

I went back the pharmacy and THEY DELETED scripts from my record.

Legal Aid & Pro-bono said they cannot recommend anyone to take my case for free since my father and sister are both attorneys they told me that they would have to either (1) come to Nashville (from Austria and Philadelphia to represent me or (2) make them pay for attorney fees.

Correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t that a little fuKt up? I spoke to someone at the PHD program because they read 64044: Medical Alert.

My sister is furious with me blames me for ruining my mothers wedding in Las Vegas, oh yeah... but she IS a "LAWYER." Whatever...

I drove 30+ miles again today to get my medical records, only to learn once again, they cannot find them.

I am so glad that there are at least a few people out there who remember me from when I was a kid people, and a few people who can identify without three blood tests to be transferred to a medical facility.

Yes, I ASKED to be committed. I called for help. I said it every single way I knew how, without asking people who were most able to give it.

I never forget a slight, and I am extremely grateful to people who didn't ask questions or doubt my intentions. I will hold themin my my thoughts, and can safely peomise that I will never again call upon you for help.

There is something to be said for paying it forward. So to people who actually took the time to phsyically see if I was okay, and to two very specuial ladies who brought me vclothing after everything I had in my possession ws taken away from me... and to the photographer who actually observed my injuries, thank you. I canhonestly say that I took one for the team. For the tweeters and twackers who let me know I was alone in my journey.. you're right I wasn't. You can tweet for peeps without bering certifiably nuts. That's not to say I am not certifiably nuts, but I thinks it rather pretentious for y'all to think that you know my mind better than I do after after 36 years. I want to believe that this feel connected to a world filled with hatred, bigotry and violence.... I made it through. And I already paid it forward.

It is pretty clear what I need, and I so tired of people asking why I can't find one. Have you seen the news? What I need is hot water. What I need is a safe place to go. What I need is the idiot who fucked up my computer to fix the damn thing. I wouldn't having a safe place for Spotty, and a little bit of acceptance. So out of respect for people that I once held in high regard, I chose to take the proper channels. I fed them information without claiming ownership... I sold a news story for $1.00. Kool... I made a dollar last year. That will pay the bills.

There were people I respected and admired, and now see as shallow and insincere. People who are afraid to be associated with someone "like" me? What exactly does that mean anyway? Aren't you impressed that I'm a Harvard Lagacy? Am I not one of the "Chosen People?"

Do you think I am living on a tiotal income of $615.00/month because it is fun?

If you can do better, pleeeeeze let me know...

If I can see somebody else doing it, then maybe I could figure out how to do it myself. I am willing to learn from anyone. Just think of all the valuabnle lessons Hitler taught us??? Yes, people are sheep.

I learned even your mistakes, so is there nothing of value that I can bring to this community???

Would you like to try going on welfare for three months or so? I think yo would enjoy the application process. After all there is nothing quite like it in the world.

So, I was "ordered" not to vvolunteer, not to call the police if I hear gun shots, because only crazy people call 911 several times in one day. Only thing is, "crazy" people exagerate the situation, so clearly if I have lived for three years, then I can certainly wait another few months. Really?

I am only allowed to use than 100 words or less in my written correspondence. Thank God for

Twitter, it is good training.

BTW (by the way ;-) The Gettysburg Address was only 267 words. Less than two tweets. Granted, I am no Lincoln, but every once in a while, I do say something important.
There is something to be said for brevity, but their is also something to be said about honesty, isolation, and the value of technology for people with disabilities. So let this be my project for "Save The Internet" because Legal Aid thought it was kinda funny when I told them that my Internet was scheduled to be diconnected.

Who needs the internet anyway? Who needs information, access, a forum, a voice??? And even if some tweets make me laugh, is that so bad?? Maybe even a small diversion from reality? Am I not worthy?

I foolishly believed that by volunteering in the community, I would come accross a real job with real wages and real benefits. Yeah, that was a great idea.

Don't worry.. I learned my lesson. I will volunteer no more. After all, why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?

Let it be known I'm a pretty quick study. I am cursed with a exceptionally vivid memory. My cortisol levels have been running low since '95. You figure it out. (Robert Sapolsky: Why Zebra's Don't Get Ulcers)

I am truly offended by the events that led people to call my family half way around the world and the country, when all they really needed to fdo was ask me. Not all "kids" are lost... some don't want to be found.

I was told to "go home." Well guess what, people? I am home.

Who thought it was a good idea to call my mommy and daddy to tell them how I am "embarrassing myself?"

Really??? Do You think they care? KUDOS TO YOU!
www.youtube.com/v/xumsvSi8qz0&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x3a3a3a&color2=0x999999&border=1">

Yes, I am reckless, I am loud, I am always right, and I am "out of my mind fucking nuts" also known as "OTWFN: Off The Wall Fucking Nuts" and that is the presumption. Don't forget, I am very much father's daughter, and am very much my mother's alibi. So thanks. Points!

All the better for them because the crazier I am, the less embarrassed they feel. How about some extra credit for their excellent parenting skills.

Crazy? Loud? Different?

Guilty, as charged. I am sooo embarrassed... how dare I post crazy shit like this online? Don't I know how bazzaar that seems? Don't you? Because let's face it... there are two possibilities:

(1) I'm telling the truth, and it's serious,

~or~

(2) I'm NOT telling the truth, and it's serious.

So for everyone who told me to go home... did you actually think my parents would rush in to rescue me? You have my parents would rush in to rescus me... sorry, but no. Now I'm stuck here.

And for the record, even suggesting that there is "home" to go to... well than YOU haven't been paying attention.

Don't you realize I am home?

I find it so hard to believe that after all this time people find it easier to speak around me and actrually think that is in my best interests? Sorry, but no.

And, you need not worry-- I don't need to be told twice where I'm not welcome.

I am less than 20 miles from several people who called Philadelphia, only to find that they don't want me either. Why would they possibly want to have me in their pristine, well-decorated homes when you paint such a lovely picture.

Guess what-- I' have never even seen my father's home... nor do I expect an invitation to Thanksgiving or Christmas.

So to all the people who "phoned home" to complain about e.d., job well done, you're stuck with me now.

And since I can't get a get a job, anmd I can't really afford the gas to go anywhere, I donb't think you need to call in a crisis team. I am perfectly happy sitting here by myself listening to my favorite youtube videos and thinking about everyone else tucjed safe and snug in their Ethan Allen beds. Good night to you all... you don't need to read this, and of course, you can ALWAYS hit delete.

That makes me sick. I never was really was a child, and it is really odd that people would start treating like one now. That is such bullshit, because child support was terminated on August 15, 1988. No other provisions were made, and I earned more money at 14 than I did in the last 10 years out together.

I miss the Barge. I think it is ridiculous that people would complain that I am "embarrassing myself.” At least I'm willing to take ownership of that one... was it less embarrassing to find out my mother contacted my professors and withdrew from classes because I was "too ill" to go to school.

Is any less embarrassing then being left at the airport on Thanksgiving Day? Or told that you do not deserve to go the dentist, that you can't sleep in the guest room if you have nightmares because you I might ruin the furnituDo think I actually give a shit about embarrassing myself? Do you think for a second they are counting on it? Did you think for one moment that there might, just, may be a reason I do not want to go home.

Is it less embarrassing than having your mother finds you "housing" at a long-term state psychiatric hospital, or being told that you might not have a fill on your soda because it cost $1.00? Is it any less embarrassing than finding out you have a new two months after he was born?

Yeah, I am embarrassed. Send me to Canada PLEEEZE!!!

Yes, I can act crazy. Yes, I may be crazy, and I sure a sh-t wish I was because there might be a possibility that created all of this "in my head.” It is not normal to have 43 addresses on file. It is not normal to care more about a cat than any single human alive. So, no, I am not normal, but does that make me bad? Does it make me dangerous? Does it want being told to "leave town" or take my own my own life so that society is not burdened by caring for me financially? Well, guess what-- I do not really care anymore, and there been many times in my life where I would rather not be alive, I refuse to let "them" Not like that.

So for so many people who have silenced me before, keep in mind I am NOT psychotic. And I am definitely not "normal"

I am done. I so "over it" by now that if your embarrassed by my actions than you are giving me way too much power. I can own behavior, and I can accept my feelings. If you.

But I will not live in fear for the rest the of my life. And if I do get evicted tomorrow, so be it. It won't be the first time. And if your really lucky, there will some great new books donated to the public library. Yes, I AM ANGRY. Anger is a very strong emotion that is key to motivational theory. So yes, I am angry AND I am motivated.

According to my mother, lovely little creature that she is, I was evicted form childhood homes in Cherry Hill, Lawrence, Great Neck (North and South) and yes, of course, that was somebody else’s fault too.

Apparently was all my stepmother's fault. Nice. At least their mother would not allow them to be thrown away with each new boyfriend, tummy tuck, Jaguar or diamond ring.

So aren’t you guys glad you called my parents because now your stuck with me, my medical bills, and student debt. Isn't that special? I came here to WORK. I came here to be a part of something. I came here to lave the past behind me. I filled my long nights volunteering at the Family Shelter. I spent my dads sleeping in four-hour shifts, and hoping that my oh-so-vivid dreams might actually be pleasant for just one night.

So if and when I do leave, you can trust that I might just have to look back and think... about my death benefit of $543 dollars and the mound of debt I acquired because think I'm capable enough to work.

Why do I know that? Because I'm paying attention to the rules and I'm payoing attention to the news. It is not so random, and it not so crazy.

So here's your challenge: Blue vs. Blue; Curtis v. Klein, and Pennsylvania Act 62. But don't worry, I'm am NOT a lawyer. And I have never fioled a single lawsuit in my entire life. Yes I have filed appeals, but that'd getting old since no one bothers to follow up. What the ~ is wrong with THAT picture??????

All I can say is this, I tried. I tried damn hard. But ya know, crazy is, crazy does.

Aren't you guys lucky to have me? This is my home. This WAS my home. Thanks for making me feel so welcome. e.d. over and out.

Elyssa Lies

<

I AM SOOOOO EMBARRASED!

Sorry for the disconnect... phone battery went dead. There is some good news (finally) Judge -- will be in the bench tomorrow...

Thank f'ing G-d! Because he is only person I can think of might actually take a look at the FACTS rather than the rumors. How many times do I have to call TennCare, Social Security, or the Mental Health Coop to tell to fix their own mistakes?


Ironically (and yes, I do think it is okay to cry, but also think it okay to laugh at your own problems too ("Lean to laugh at your problems, everyone else will.” When I told my rep payee to take good records, I let him know that even IF he things I'm pout my mind with paranoia, It would be so much easier to just do that than it would be to deal with me.

Legal Aid won't represent me because they said they limited resources-- well guess what? SO DO I!!!!

I went back the pharmacy and THEY DELETED scripts from my record.

Legal Aid & Pro-bono said they cannot recommend anyone to take my case for free since my father and sister are both attorneys they told me that they would have to either (1) come to Nashville (from Austria and Philadelphia to represent me or (2) make them pay for attorney fees.

Correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t that a little fuKt up? I spoke to someone at the PHD program because they read 64044: Medical Alert.

My sister is furious with me blames me for ruining my mothers wedding in Las Vegas, oh yeah... but she IS a "LAWYER." Whatever...

I drove 30+ miles again today to get my medical records, only to learn once again, they cannot find them.

I am so glad that there are at least a few people out there who remember me from when I was a kid people, and a few people who can identify without three blood tests to be transferred to a medical facility.

Yes, I ASKED to be committed. I called for help. I said it every single way I knew how, without asking people who were most able to give it.

I never forget a slight, and I am extremely grateful to people who didn't ask questions or doubt my intentions. I will hold themin my my thoughts, and can safely peomise that I will never agai call upon you for help.

There is something to be said for paying it forward. So to people who actually took the time to phsyically see if I was okay, and to two very specuial ladies who brought me vclothing after everything I had in my possession ws taken away from me... and to the photographer who actually observed my injuries, thank you. I canhonestly say that I took one for the team. For the tweeters and twackers who let me know I was alone in my journey.. you're right I wasn't. You can tweet for peeps without bering certifiably nuts. That's not to say I am not certifiably nuts, but I thinks it rather pretentious for y'all to think that you know my mind better than I do after after 36 years. I want to believe that this feel connected to a world filled with hatred, bigotry and violence.... I made it through. And I already paid it forward.

It is pretty clear what I need, and I so tired of people asking why I can't find one. Have you seen the news? What I need is hot water. What I need is a safe place to go. What I need is the idiot who fucked up my computer to fix the damn thing. I wouldn't having a safe place for Spotty, and a little bit of acceptance. So out of respect for people that I once held in high regard, I chose to take the proper channels. I fed them information without claiming ownership... I sold a news story for $1.00. Kool... I made a dollar last year. That will pay the bills.

There were people I respected and admired, and now see as shallow and insincere. People who are afraid to be associated with someone "like" me? What exactly does that mean anyway? Aren't you impressed that I'm a Harvard Lagacy? Am I not one of the "Chosen People?"

Do you think I am living on a tiotal income of $615.00/month because it's fun?

If yes-- then jsyut let mek now... I'd be happy to see it done so I would know how to do it myself. Iam willing to learn from you, even your mistakes, so is there nothing of value that I can bring to this community???

Would you like to try going on welfare for three months or so? I think yo would enjoty the application process. After all there is nothing quite like it in the world.

So I was "ordered" not to vvolunteer, not to call the police if I hear bgun shgots, and I was ordered to use less than o100 words in every correspondence. There is something to be said for brevity, but their is also something to be sdaid about honesty, and isolation. SO tTHIS is my project to Save The Internet, because legal aid laughed at me when I told them that internet was scheduled to be diconnected.

Who needs internet anyway? Who needs information, communication and maybe even a small diversion from reality.

I foolishly believed that by volunteering in the community, I would come accross a real job with real wages and real benefits. Yeah, that was a great idea.

Don't worry.. I learned my lesson. I will volunteer no more. After all, why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?

Let it be known I'm a pretty quick study. I was cursed with a exceptionally vivid memory, and my cortisol levels have been running since 1995. You fiugure it out. (Robert Sapolsky: Why Zebra's Don't Get Ulcers)

I am truly offended by the events that led people to call my family half way around the world and the country, when all they really needed to fdo was ask me. Not all "kids" are lost... some don't want to be found.

I was told to "go home." Well guess what, people? I am home.

Who thought it was a good idea to call my mommy and daddy to tell them how I am "embarrassing myself?"

Really??? Do You think they care? KUDOS TO YOU!

www.youtube.com/v/xumsvSi8qz0&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x3a3a3a&color2=0x999999&border=1">

Yes, I am reckless, I am loud, I am always right, and I am "out of my mind fucking nuts" also known as "OTWFN: Off The Wall Fucking Nuts" and that is the presumption. Don't forget, I am very much father's daughter, and am very much my mother's alibi. So thanks.

All the better for them because the crazier I am, the more credit they get for their excellent parenting. Guilty, as charged. I'm sooo embarrassed... how dare I post crazy shit like this online? Don't I know how bazzaar that seems? Don't you? Because let's face it... there are two possibilities:

(1) I'm telling the truth, and it is serious,

~or~

(2) I'm mot telling the truth, and it is serious

So for everyone who told me to go home... did you actually think my parents would rush in to rescue me? You have my parents would rush in to rescus me... sorry, but no. Now I'm stuck here.

And for the record, even suggesting that there is "home" to go to... well than YOU haven't been paying attention.

Don't you realize I am home?

I find it so hard to believe that after all this time people find it easier to speak around me and actrually think that is in my best interests? Sorry, but no.

And, you need not worry-- I don't need to be told twice where I'm not welcome.

I am less than 20 miles from several people who called Philadelphia, only to find that they don't want me either. Why would they possibly want to have me in their pristine, well-decorated homes when you paint such a lovely picture.

Guess what-- I' have never even seen my father's home... nor do I expect an invitation to Thanksgiving or Christmas.

So to all the people who "phoned home" to complain about e.d., job well done, you're stuck with me now.

And since I can't get a get a job, anmd I can't really afford the gas to go anywhere, I donb't think you need to call in a crisis team. I am perfectly happy sitting here by myself listening to my favorite youtube videos and thinking about everyone else tucjed safe and snug in their Ethan Allen beds. Good night to you all... you don't need to read this, and of course, you can ALWAYS hit delete.

That makes me sick. I never was really was a child, and it is really odd that people would start treating like one now. That is such bullshit, because child support was terminated on August 15, 1988. No other provisions were made, and I earned more money at 14 than I did in the last 10 years out together.

I miss The Barge. I think it is ridiculous that people would complain that I am "embarrassing myself.” At least I'm willing to take ownership of that one... was it less embarrassing to find out my mother contacted my professors and withdrew from classes because I was "too ill" to go to school.

Is any less embarrassing then being left at the airport on Thanksgiving Day? Or told that you do not deserve to go the dentist, that you can't sleep in the guest room if you have nightmares because you I might ruin the furnituDo think I actually give a shit about embarrassing myself? Do you think for a second they are counting on it? Did you think for one moment that there might, just, may be a reason I do not want to go home.

Is it less embarrassing than having your mother finds you "housing" at a long-term state psychiatric hospital, or being told that you might not have a fill on your soda because it cost $1.00? Is it any less embarrassing than finding out you have a new two months after he was born?

Yeah, I am embarrassed. Send me to Canada PLEEEZE!!!

Yes, I can act crazy. Yes, I may be crazy, and I sure a sh-t wish I was because there might be a possibility that created all of this "in my head.” It is not normal to have 43 addresses on file. It is not normal to care more about a cat than any single human alive. So, no, I am not normal, but does that make me bad? Does it make me dangerous? Does it want being told to "leave town" or take my own my own life so that society is not burdened by caring for me financially? Well, guess what-- I do not really care anymore, and there been many times in my life where I would rather not be alive, I refuse to let "them" Not like that.

So for so many people who have silenced me before, keep in mind I am NOT psychotic. And I am definitely mot "normal"

I am done. I so "over it" by now that if your embarrassed by my actions than you are giving me way too much power. I can own behavior, and I can accept my feelings. If you.

But I will not live in fear for the rest the of my life. And if I do get evicted tomorrow, so be it. It won't be the first time. And if your really lucky, there will some great new books donated to the public library. Yes, I AM ANGRY. Anger is a very strong emotion that is key to motivational theory. So yes, I am angry AND I am motivated.

According to my mother, lovely little creature that she is, I was evicted form childhood homes in Cherry Hill, Lawrence, Great Neck (North and South) and yes, of course, that was somebody else’s fault too.

Apparently was all my stepmother's fault. Nice. At least their mother would not allow them to be thrown away with each new boyfriend, tummy tuck, Jaguar or diamond ring.

So aren’t you guys glad you called my parents because now your stuck with me, my medical bills, and student debt. Isn't that special? I came here to work. I came here to be a part of something greater than myself. I came here to leave the past behind me. I filled my long nights volunteering at the Nashville Safehaven Family Shelter. I spent my days sleeping in four hour shifts, and hoping that my oh-so-vivid dreams might actually be pleasant for just one night.

So if and when I do leave, you can trust that I might just have to look back and think... about my death benefit under of $600 dollars and the mound of debt I acquired because no one thinks I am capable enough to work.

Why do I know that? Because I'm paying attention to the rules and I'm payoing attention to the news. It is not so random, and it not so crazy.

So here's your challenge: Blue vs. Blue; Curtis v. Klein, Varity v. Howe, and Pennsylvania Act 62. But don't worry, I'm am NOT a lawyer. And, for the record, I have never filed a single lawsuit in my entire life.

What the ~ is wrong with THAT picture??????

All I can say is this, I tried. I tried damn hard. But ya know, crazy is, crazy does.

Aren't you guys lucky to have me? This is my home. This WAS my home. Thanks for making me feel so welcome.

ed: over and out.

A Brief History of Tennessee Healthcare

(For Historical Reference)



1996: Throughout the three year process of filing appeal after appeal after appeal, I acquired well over 1/4 million dollars in debt due to uninsured medical expenses and student loans. My life will never be the same. My heart will never be the same.

1999: Patient X: Corporate TennCare adjusted the prescription formulary over Memorial Day in 1999 and failed refused to offer a 3-day or 14-Day emergency supply as mandated by Grier.

2001: I have no other benefits. No Social Security checks to count on; no disability payments to pull together; no Medicare to meet me when the bottom falls out, again. This surely is not the first time my Medicaid has not come through as a reliable source of payment. It is not even the second or third time. It more like the eight or ninth, maybe more often than that. I only recently qualified for Medicaid some eight months ago! Since then, I have already acquired several thousand dollars in unpaid medical expenses that have made their way to collection agencies.

2002: Before my benefits were stabilized, learning to navigate the system consumed every waking moment of my life. I was unable to work or attend school on any substantial level and I am frightened to see at might happen if I were to stray from my established, stabilized, treatment plan. If I lose my benefits, will I still be able to work? To function? To be productive?

2005: The massive number of people being dis-enrolled or limited in their access to medical care and other social services will no doubt create significant anxiety, confusion, and chaos for everyone involved in the social service and health care industries.

2006: Without my current level of benefits, I simply do not function.

2007: I remember how difficult it was for me to obtain benefits when I first applied several years ago. I am deeply concerned about how the most recent decision to eradicate yet another class of TennCare / Medicaid recipients (the Daniels class that is made up of SSI recipients by way of a pending federal waiver) will affect the poor and disabled residents in Tennessee.

MAY 2008: And even though my life has become a living hell, I have almost learned to enjoy the sheer irony of it all... for someone with OCD and post-traumatic stress, this is truly a ridiculous little experiment.

JULY 2008: I am becoming increasingly inspired to just burn every last document I own, throw away my keys and my cell phone and take Spotty some place where we can live off the land, but I have come this far, and I am becoming rather skilled at expressing myself without an audience or the obsessive need to check every fact, throw, and typo for capitalization and perfection.

AUGUST 2008: So after all this-- now I face losing my health care once again? Where is the safety net? Where is the American Dream that I so diligently chased after for so many years? What was the point spending so much on an education that will never be utilized? I understand the how; I just don't understand why.

LAST MONTH: So for now... I write. Maybe later, I'll read. But if there is any justice left in this world, maybe someday, I'll actually live.

TODAY: Good-bye for now. I need a break.

Pharmacy Fallout '08 [Draft]

The Powers That Beat


Here's the latest snafu in the State of Tennessee: TennCare Changes Benefits Without Notice Effective October 1, 2008.
.
TennCare providers, beneficiaries and advocates are once again unaware of how the new changes will affect their benefits or services concerning changes to the pharmacy plan that were implemented on October 1, 2008. No information about the changes (e.g., formulary changes, benefits coverage, or appeals, grievances or override procedures were given to providers, participants or local sent

TennCare providers, beneficiaries and advocates are once again unaware of the new changes in the pharmacy program that went into effect on October 1, 2008. New procedures were implemented by providers that have obvious HIPPA violations. Federal agencies and advocates should direct consumers to the appropriate federal agencies regarding HIPPA compliance and other possible violations of federal law.

I did find out some additional information, which is this: THERE IS NO INFORMATION!!!

Providers and consumers are unaware of new changes to the Pharmacy program for TennCare beneficiaries.

I have searched the news, the state, and cannot get through to the TennCare hotline... The last I heard, pharmacies began processing scripts late yesterday afternoon, however they are running into significant problems obtaining approval (specifically--overrides) for their TennCare participants.

I gotta tell you that I found some VERY disturbing information that was callously given to each and every TennCare recipient who had prescriptions filled at the pharmacy I went to.

I will tell you that it is a large national chain implemented new procedures for Medicaid recipients covered under the new plan. They claim it was required to obtain reimbursement from the new Rx provider. I necessary to to deal with the new pharmacy program that went into effect Oct 1, 2008..

I will scan that document and upload it to advocates since it is so over the top regarding medical privacy and HIPPA compliance.

I personally refused to sign the document, instead signing "HIPPA" instead of my name. Prescriptions will not be dispensed without the beneficiaries signature on the master list.

Take now for now,

Elyssa Durant



FOR HISTORICAL REFERENCE:


2008: I remember how difficult it was for me to obtain benefits when I first applied several years ago. I am deeply concerned about how the most recent decision to eradicate yet another class of TennCare / Medicaid recipients (the Daniels class that is made up of SSI recipients by way of a pending federal waiver) will affect the poor and disabled residents in Tennessee.

2006: Without my current level of benefits, I simply do not function.

2002: Before my benefits were stabilized, learning to navigate the system consumed every waking moment of my life. I was unable to work or attend school on any substantial level and I am frightened to see at might happen if I were to stray from my established, stabilized, treatment plan. If I lose my benefits, will I still be able to work? To function? To be productive?

2005: The massive number of people being dis-enrolled or limited in their access to medical care and other social services will no doubt create significant anxiety, confusion, and chaos for everyone involved in the social service and health care industries.

2001: I have no other benefits. No Social Security checks to count on; no disability payments to pull together; no Medicare to meet me when the bottom falls out, again. This surely is not the first time my Medicaid has not come through as a reliable source of payment. It is not even the second or third time. It more like the eight or ninth, maybe more often than that. I only recently qualified for Medicaid some eight months ago! Since then, I have already acquired several thousand dollars in unpaid medical expenses that have made their way to collection agencies.

1999: Patient X: Corporate TennCare adjusted the prescription formulary over Memorial Day in 1999 and failed refused to offer a 3-day or 14-Day emergency supply as mandated by Grier.

1996: Throughout the three year process of filing appeal after appeal after appeal, I acquired well over 1/4 million dollars in debt due to uninsured medical expenses and student loans. My life will never be the same. My heart will never be the same.

TODAY: So after all this-- now I face losing my healthcare once again? Where is the safety net? Where is the American Dream that I so diligently chased after for so many years? What was the point spending so much on an education that will never be utilized? I understand the how; I just don't understand why.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

http://unitedprofessionals.org/blog/forum/topic.php?id=105

*****************************************

Pharmacy Fallout '08: Here We Go Again
Providers and Consumers Are Unaware of New Changes to the Pharmacy Program for TennCare Beneficiaries, Effective October 1, 2008


Here's the latest in the State of Tennessee: TennCare Changes Benefits Without Notice Effective October 1, 2008.
.
TennCare providers, beneficiaries and advocates are once again unaware of how the new changes will affect their benefits or services concerning changes to the pharmacy plan that were implemented on October 1, 2008. No information about the changes (e.g., formulary changes, benefits coverage, or appeals, grievances or override procedures were given to providers, participants or local sent

TennCare providers, beneficiaries and advocates are once again unaware of the new changes in the pharmacy program that went into effect on October 1, 2008. New procedures were implemented by providers that have obvious HIPPA violations. Federal agencies and advocates should direct consumers to the appropriate federal agencies regarding HIPPA compliance and other possible violations of federal law.

I did find out some additional information, which is this:

THERE IS NO INFORMATION!!!

Providers and consumers are unaware of new changes to the Pharmacy program for TennCare beneficiaries.

I have searched the news, the state, and cannot get through to the TennCare hotline... The last I heard, pharmacies began processing scripts late yesterday afternoon, however they are running into significant problems obtaining approval (specifically--overrides) for their TennCare participants.

I gotta tell you that I found some VERY disturbing information that was callously given to each and every TennCare recipient who had prescriptions filled at the pharmacy I went to.

One large national drug store chain implemented new procedures for specific to Medicaid recipients covered under the new plan. The pharmacy manager claims this was required by the underwriters in order to obtain reimbursement for covered medications and/or pharmacy services. These changes went into effect the day before the new plan was set to launch.

I will scan that document and upload it to advocates since it is so over the top regarding medical privacy and HIPPA compliance.

I personally refused to sign the document, instead signing "HIPPA" instead of my name. Prescriptions will not be dispensed without the beneficiaries signature on the master list.

Elyssa Durant
TennCare Beneficiary


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Resources
www.familiesusa.org
www.thcc2.org
www.unitedprofessionals.com